suddenly, i am afraid, that no one will really accept me in this new class..

a barrier has been slowly built.. now, i can still get through.. but later?

i dont know.........

uncertainty n thats all i have in mind now... and somekind of pressure from homework and all that stuff.. my head seems like jamming.. i dont know.. maybe it's just my feeling not for real.. hopefully...

today is an important day of my life, I think....
im going to move out from somerset to east coast... which in fact, takes longer to go to school..
however, i need to move for reasons..
i cant say i dont like to live here.

since yesterday , my head is empty.. just thinking about unnecessary things which has no use at all..
i feel weird and damn sleepy everytime.. maybe im going to be sick soon..

now, i am on my own..

the question is how i'll maintain "the bridge" ?
she told me to keep it.. but how?
there's a gap that i ,till now cant close.....
we are too far...
she doesnt know...

im going to move... go away from your life... im just hoping i left good/ average impression here, as long as its not bad... i really wish ... i feel that you dont really like me... and dont want to see me anymore.. i hope its not true.. if its true , what should i do? i dont think i can fix it...

i need to stop being emo......

please brain! stop it!
let the time heals the wound...........

hi!!
=)

somehow im not really happy today..
my mom and sister just went back to indo..
and as a jobless person today , im alone in this room..
all i do just listening to music and write this thing..
so empty and silent.. i like it but i dont like..
=.=??
watever~~

i gain maybe 2 kg .. OMG!!
I NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT!! AND IT STARTS FROM TODAY!!!!!!!!
GANBATTE!!
I CAN!!
=)

i love my life.........

new days ..
new friends..
new job (waitress and student)

but still........
it will fade away..
like the mist in the morning which will gone as the sun rises uphigh...........
thats life..
nothing eternal..
sad..
happy..
angry..
anything you feel

LALALALALLA~~~~

HAI!!!!
see you again!!=)

i got a lot of things to write today.,,
1. nata n reta went back to indo.. congrats guys.. have a save flight.. then i texted you guys but no reply?? zzzz...
2. prayer is all about His will.. =)
3. eeerrrrmm.. i served quite well. 1 customer said thanks and said my name.. hahaha special for me! maybe i sounds so exagerate.. but i do feel happy about that.. he is a father with a family though so.. its pure about good service.. hhahahh
4. i remembered the regular customer ... hahaha scary little boy.. rice lovers!!!! lol!!!! =D
5. i dare to ask him whether he is a gay or not.. hahahha and he is a gay ! he said im the only one who dont believe him when he said he is a gay.. i thought he was kidding! lol...
i asked him the very big question i have in my mind..
me: are you seriously a gay?
him: yesterday i saw my BOYFRIEND.. i saw him with another guy.. i want to say hi to him but at the end i didnt do it..
me: how if you see a very handsome guy?? =)
him: like you loh.. like magnet!! (lol..)
me: how if you see a very sexy lady?
him:(i forget what he said.. but i think he feel nothing...)
him: to love a guy is the same like to love a girl but same sex.. (i think he said so.. if im not mistaken) love your parents .. etc.. its love rite..
me: (actually a bit confused...) lol....
i needed to do something else so i finish it first and then come again..
me: FINALLY I DARE TO ASK YOU THIS!! HAHHA
hopefully he dont mind im asking him..... but he seemed ok and gave those answers enthusiastically.. hahaha =D
since that i wanted to ask more.. SHIT!!!!
IM CURIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!! SERIOUSLY I AMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!
UNFORTUNATELY HE WILL GO SOON TO MALAYSIA AND NEVER COME BACK.. I CANT ASK HIM ANYMORE... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....
he is a very good friend.. the most caring of all.. its a pity he has to go so soon.. but its ok.. many other good people will replace him.. =)

questions trigerred in mind...
>how come you become a gay?
>do your parents know?
>have you ever like your own guy friends( since all his friends are guy...)?
> dont say that all of you are gay?????? lol!!!!! =D HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA

these questions and thoughts are not to make of him.. I HONOUR his courage to tell the world that he is a gay!!!
I THINK THATS COOL... b=.=d (2 thumbs up) =)

Thanks God you made me meet a bit of reality in this world.. many anomaly happened in this world and i feel happy to experienced 1 of this phenomenon.. (lebay......) but thats more or less what i felt... =)
i dont care about what do you think of me this time.. somehow i dont care... YES!!!

Q: if anyone read this.. please give an answer to this...
is it a sin to become a gay/lesbian?
but then , how if they were born as that nature? they cant choose to be normal.. some people were born in this condition rite?

i

s e e d i ff e r en t


w o rld
t h a t
i
've

n e v e r s e e n
before.........................................................

CALLED
r e a l i t y

t ha t

unfairness is happening

b
ut

you can't
do a n y t hing a b o ut it.....................

smile...
makes the world seems better..
makes other feels better..
something easy but not many people doing it..
smile..
=)