2 things happened today..
1> i ran super fast and Nata laughed really2 alot at me!!! and she wrote it in her blog..
hahahha
it's ok though.. funny and embarassing.. =D hahahahahhaha
cant stop laughing also...

2> i was in the bus.. there was an indian old woman sat on the chair.. then came a chinese old woman and sat next to her.. suddenly they talked to each other.. but i dont know whether they were talking in the same language or not.. but they seemed to understand each other (i presumed they both talking in different language) hahahha it's funny.. but they seemed so happy..

im just thinking.. if no one is racist... never look down on anyone , this world would be a better place to live.. i confess, i sometimes look down to certain kind of people and i think everyone also has a tendency of doing/thinking so but in different rate.. im so sorry for that.. i'll try to be more fair.. since we are created equally.. gender, raise, language, or whatever difference we have , should be seen as variety that make the world more beautiful..

Thanks God for whatever situation you've placed me.. came to singapore was a big decision for me . Thankfully, you made me see outside my comfort zone and let me learn from it.. Thanks to have made me met such great friends and people... Thanks for Your great love and blessing for just a human like me who can never give You a return..

kosong...
hari ini begitu kosong..
melompong ...
kaya kakek nenek yg giginya ompong..
(pemanasan...)

HAMPA

angin berhembus ..
menepis.. membuai pikiran ke dalam kehampaan..
bagai ruang anti gravitasi
dimana semua bisa terjadi tiada arti..

butir butir kenangan melewati sang pikiran
menambah rasa hampa yg tiada henti
ingin diriku berhenti
meratapi apa yg telah terjadi..

MEMORI
memori..
keberadaanmu abadi...
di dalam setiap otak manusia yg fana ini..

memori..
kau begitu indah..
bahagia, senang , tidak ingin bangun!!
membuai pikiran dengan kebahagiaan semu..

memori..
kau memalukan!!
emosi, gejolak, amarah, kekesalan yg ada..
membuat manusia ini tertawa dalam kebodohannya sendiri..

memori
kau menyakitkan..
tangis, kepedihan , kehilangan..
menyatu dalam tetesan air mata yg jatuh ke bumi

memori..
jangan ganggu aku lagi dengan kepedihan
karena aku manusia yg rapuh..
yg mudah runtuh , terpengaruhi oleh mu.. sang memori..

puisi ini d tulis hanya semata2 pendramatisiran dan tidak ada hubungannya dengan kehidupan nyata..
mengisi waktu yg membosankan..
=)

.......................................................................................................................................................................
kulihat bintang dari sudut kamar yg mungil ..
begitu terang.. memukau..
memanjakan mata dengan keindahan ciptaan sang Pencipta..

hanya satu ..
paling terang..
kulihat hampir setiap malam..
dengan setia menemani sang rembulan..
.......................................................................................................................................................................
MANUSIA..

sang mentari pagi akan datang kembali..
pertanda.. dimulainya hari baru yg penuh energi..
lembar baru siap menanti.. dengan seribu satu kemungkinan yang akan terjadi..
sayangnya manusia tak akan pernah tahu..

dan itulah indahnya menjadi manusia..
menantikan hari penuh ketakterdugaan dan ketidakpastian ..
sampai pada akhirnya..
berpulang bersama Bapa di sorga..
yg berarti berhenti mengalami segala kekhawatiran, kepedihan, kejengkelan
saat itulah.. akhir dari segala kesengsaraan dan ketidakpastian..
dan sifat kemnusiaan yg fana ini..
yg mungkin akan kuingin rasakan kembali..
INILAH .. PENGAKUAN SANG MANUSIA FANA..

END OF (HALF) BULLSHITTING PAGE...
=)

happy sunday~~

i went to church today...
i was late... i supposed to be an usher but i woke up late.. so yeah..
hahhaha
the ceremony went the same as usual..
you know what?
i dont know but this time.. i felt He is there!!! i believe He always be with us..
but this time i really could feel He was there.. closer than ever!!!
i felt like saver and happier.. and i think it made things looks different? dont know..
I THINK THIS IS AMAZING!!!
=)
i hope everyday feels like today...
im just a sheep in a farm.. which sometimes lost.. im not a real sheep so i cant describe how a sheep feel when it lost the sheep keeper.. but i think it would feels like this?
out of stress, relieving, peace, and joy..
=)
i <3 JESUS.. let me feel Your presence everytime...
i hope those who read this.. can feel the same like me..

i think , like a sheep.. we sometimes lost the keeper's presence (make us feeling lost??) but the keeper always know where we are.. He always keep watching us... and ready to save us whenever we are in danger....

<3 <3 <3 =3
God bless us..

d buat atas request natalia christie...

ke pantai makan kelapa
tiba2 ada tsunami (amit2)
ga tau kenapa
klo sama dia pasti hahahihi

dear anak tere..
kamu tidur di bawah pohon palem..
makan mc d jam 6 sore..
lanjut kfc j 7 malem..
mantep ga .. ????
combo cuy!!!

ada kucing makan mangga
bukannya ketelen malah tersedak
liat video kfc pamela
bukannya seksi malahan kocak
(pamela anderson jd jubir kfc (kentucky fried cruelty) loh.. kocak abis.. gosip ttg pembunuhan sadis ayam2 broiler .. dia menghasut jg org2 jd vegetarian..)

ada anjing masuk ke sawah..
dihajar tuh anjing sampe lebam2...
lumayan seru kasih makan kucing di bawah..
nyumput2 takut ketauan satpam..

sejumput cacing nemplok di kepala
saingan medusa si kepala ular
taukah anda kenapa?
denda 1 kucing = 10 dollar

ada org digigit ular kadut
dia teriak sambil berkoar-koar
itulah alasan saya takut
6 kucing = 60 dollar!!!

suami2 takut istri
karena suka digebukin sapu lidi
kayanya trial kedua ini
ga selucu yg pertama kali

ada bantal bau apek
gara2 orgnya ngacai kemana-mana
otak mampet kaya pilek
dipaksa kerja ga bisa2

ada boboho minum teh kotak
lu liatin ky mimpi
masi pengen meres otak
mari lanjut berpantun esok hari..

bintang di langit ga mungkin digapai
yu dadah babai......

hello...
today... was great i've done so many things and get so many things to reflect..
=)
i've solved the faxing problem with help of my maid and my mom secretary.. i've done housework..
i've spent so much money on eating.. i've seen a really nice fashion show at school.. many pretty girls were there..
hahhahah
=D

im just realized...
i was walking to the bus stop... waiting for the green light.. then.. 139 bus, as usual passed by in front of my eyes!!! i was quite sad and pissed.. regretting the bus.. so i have to wait for several minutes for another 139 bus..
you know what.. the second bus became better.. im just realized.. sometimes He made us failed or not achieving what we hope to be true... but then.. it doesnt mean you totally failed.. maybe He just asked to wait .. for a better one.. you must be sure another bus will come.. same as your hope.. at least one of those hope will come true .. the thing is you dont know how long you have to wait.. patience.. then see.. =)

second!!
i was just dipped my feet into the pool.. then just play with the water with my hand..
i felt that water can not be grabbed.. you can just try to contain it bare hands.. but how long can you stand holding teh water? at the end the water will escape from tiny holes you made in your hands.. you can just feel the water.. it's there and its cold..
i think its related to understand people and God..
However hard you try to understand them the more you can not understand them.. ( when you tried to squeezed the water.. the water will gone faster, dripping here and there) people's mind and God are full of mystery.. what you know about them is just as scope of water from a pool or sea?? i think the more you try to understand the more you confused .. at the end.. you'll be dissapointed or confused.. how? why? i just feel like so..
e.g: many people try to understand Him in just completely human mind.. (thinker??/ sociologist/whatever they are called) until one day they were stuck with one unanswerable question.. they became depressed and SUICIDE!! with all human mind we can never understand Him completely.. you can know some things about Him but not all.. when you cant find the answer dont keep thinking of it.. accept it or maybe asked other people with better understanding of Him.. He is God.. we can understand what He wants and what He likes/dislikes.. but we can never understand the whole thing of Him... e.g: how He really created this world of imperfection? til now there's no exact evidence to prove how the earth and galaxy was created.. same as friends.. you can know them well.. but how well? even they are so close to you at the end you'll sometimes dont understand them and you can never exactly 'read' their mind.. what you can do is just TRUST.. They are your precious.. and we have to keep them carefully..

for people.. i think God already given us a precious 'gem' inside everybody.. sometimes i 'see' it in them.. but then.. i can never see the gem inside me.. i know we all have including me.. im just can never seen it..
i hope i can see it inside me soon.. when that time comes i must have already accepted my whole self.. but it will take a really long time i think..

watever im talking here are just my random thoughts.. im just happy with it.. and have no regret of sharing it.. thanks to have read my thing.. hope you get something useful from it..
=)
<3 <3 <3
my bad and my good.. so far.. i only can see my bad.. and never my good..

hei...

hari ini bahasa indo ah....
errrmmm.. apa ya??
ga ad topik...

ok.. mari berpantun..
hahahah
=D

ada kucing makan taleus..
buah mangga d kupas abis..
g bosen ama males..
kerjain tugas ga abis2...

si bokir rada conge..
g ngomong ga didenge..
g pikir lu sahabat gue..
tp ternyata ga juga deh..

andai kucing punya sayap..
tom2 d rumah pasti udah terbang..
ketemu Mary sangat mantap
lima menit d suruh pulang..

ayam kampung ayam negeri..
dimutilasi terus dikuliti..
jadi org harus rendah hati..
klo ingin d hormati..

ada tinju g tepis..
ada tendang g tangkis..
masih pengen g nulis2..
tapi ide udah abis..

sumpeh... hari ini blogging terkonyol sepanjang masa!!!
random ma kocak abis.. g kesamber kali y..
hahhaha
=D

hei..
have you ever thought of any place on earth you feel really comfortable and safe?
i just realized..
believe it or not.. my favourite place on earth is my bathroom... i got nothing special inside it..
it's just a small toilet , shower and wastafel.. nothing special..
simple, yet functioning..
i feel save, comfortable and relaxing in the toilet..
no one interrupt you ..
clear of your mind with hot water... sometimes i get ideas there.. thats one more factor i think why i like it..
hahhahah
=D
reflection???
errrrrmmm..
i think what ci ita said is true.. we're all ordinary... like the toilet.. nothing special.. however you feel save etc inside that ordinary room.. i hope i can be someone useful and give others comfort when they need it.. God is the planner.. im just the product.. and you (i dont know who though).. hahahha might be the target HE set for me to serve for Him.. throughout my ordinary and imperfect personality... like an architect/designer set up the interior or product to be marketed for specified market target..

i dont know though.. weird toilet reflection.. hahhaha
=D

well....
today... i dont know why...
feel depressed? pressed??
something is wrong...
but dont know what is that...
ughhhhh...
=( a bit jealous of others work...
please... stabilize yourself and do more work...
please!!!!
no much time left!!!!!!!!!!

hei...
wanna hear any story?
today...
is fine...
nothing special..
but everything i do always wrong...
except: taking letters from the box and washing the dishes..
any other things is wrong...
huff...
im quite tired now...
=.=
plain..................

????

blog describing the owner's better..
at least you express what you think...
i saw other's blog...
some i saw their true colors inside it...
some.. are amazingly unpredictable...
some are emo.. some are happy and full of sweet things.. some are introspective..
for me?
i just write what i think .. and i think it's not interesting at all..
im just an ordinary person without anything special .. personality or even skill..
im just a watcher who see from far..
im a coward who dont dare to speak..
i have nothing positive..
im moody and change easily..
im using different masks ..
i feel guilty .. i hope i can change..
be myself and show my true color..
I hope i can say "i dont care what you see in me"

im a random person who always talking and thinking here and there..
never concentrate 100% ..
lazy and naive?
i think these are some pieces of me..
thanks to all of my friends who has accepted such a boring person like me without any complaints and always made me happy and be there for me whenever i feel sad or troubled..
now i have 2 precious friends.. i hope they never regret make friends with me ..
plus 3 guardians who always keep watching me and be there for me..hahaha..
thanks to all humans who care and love me as their friend, bestfriend(if possible), daughter and sister or whatever family status i am..
special , great thanks to my Father.. who always be at my side.. but sometimes i didnt realized it... He has such a really huge love and affection that comfort me.
deep inside my heart , somewhere, He is there guiding me..
thanks to this blog.. everytime i feel down i write on you and can found Him at the end that can shed my tears , confuse, and dissapointment.
love all of you my friends, my family, and especially for You who always keep watching me from there...
=)

HHAHAHHA =D =.=v

hei...

im happy...
you know what?
my guessing was true
he likes her!!

both of them are in my class...
wohohohooh
=.=...
watch your status and behaviour..
or maybe i'll know something...
hahahha
joking..
it was quite obvious so i knew...
ok...
back to work...
wkwkkwkwkwk
peace....
=.=V

hai my blog...

i should share you this...
rather than sad alone...

i never know what's in your mind...
i wanna know.. but i dont dare to speak.. i think im an outsider the one who doesnt need to know..
i think im quite close to you but actually its not true..
i have no rights to know...
my brain.. please dont be a kepo!!
its none of my bussiness.. and you dont want me to know... so yeah... accept it!!
i hope im a plegmatic (i am... supposed to..)but why this thing never comes out in the right time!!

u r my friend but im not as that close to know...
btw, what's the motive for me to know? gossipping?
i think no... i just wanna know... but then what else?
whats the point?
...................................

its your own fault .. you feel sad in the wrong time... you dont have to.. CANT MAYBE..
You cant said i have the right to know...
case closed... dont be a kepo.. not good..
=)
im not sad anymore...
hahahhah
NATA... I HOPE U R HERE...
SO BORING...
=(

quite a weird day....

since yesterday... there's always a topic of love...
whether it's about a true love or monkey love????
hahhaha

love... what is love?

is this a week from HIM for me to learn and see what is love?

Love... can be dangerous.. i think...
it's sweet and can bring you lots of happiness...
at the same time so much ache and sadness...
what is the purpose of love and loving ? why God created such feeling that is so dangerous?
love someone or something more than love Him...

Oh God.. forgive me for this feeling... if i can .. i choose to have never love anyone in my life except You... it's so hard to get rid of it... by the way.. IM NOT IN LOVE THOUGH... it WAS...
i hope.. i'll never love for anyone TOO DEEPLY (is the grammar correct?) .. too much pain ... i dont dare... im just a crybaby..
let my love to You always take over me and my thoughts...
for conclusion.. i hope my thoughts about love is wrong... but who knows.. lets see tomorrow and so on...

i still wanna write.. what else should i write?
errrrrrrmmmmmmmmm...

i just watched "date night" it's also about LOVE!!
just realized..

why people need love? i think everyone knows the consequences of loving someone.. but why people (including me) still want it? what's so special about it? weird...
i dont believe if in my age there is somebody who NEVER falling in love.. i would amazed...
but if it's happened i feel a bit jealous... she/he may never feel hurt by it.. everyday happy!! no thoughts about losing your loved ones.. that would be WOW!!

i just think...
am i too egoist till i dont want to fall in love?

well... its my thoughts.. and is scattered around.. see my writtings? i'm talking here and there..

or..
am i not mature enough ?
life is not always a happy journey where you can always get what you want.. there's always a pain that you have to feel ... or is it just my thoughts that suffering and pain is exist? but i cant say that suffering is not exist... =.=?? i think the best answer is .. its all up to you and your thoughts to take over your brain to say im happy and feel content , feel i can accept it and i can get something positive over it..to whatever happened... HE is the ONE who always can give us the strength and joy to whatever condition we had..

sorry for my bad english.. i tried to write in english to improve (hopefully) my english...
i still want to write.. but i need to do my work... see you later my blog.. i'll write again maybe in the morning? if i still have energy and mood to write and OBVIOUSLY TOMORROW!!
INTERESTING STORIES WILL COME SOON!!!
NOWWWWW!!!
DO YOUR WORK DUMB!!!
HAHAHHAHAHAH
=D

TODAY.....

THE RED THREAD

there is a red thread...
between her and him....
somehow connected them...
howfar she goes, he will always somehow shown up...
regain all her memories and love story about him...
the tie between them..
weird but amazing...
soulmate?
is it real?
i think it is....
=)
all d best for those im talking about...

hi .....
ermmmmm....
everything u hav now is about choices... It's all about your choosen option.. whether its right or wrong... or relatively right and relatively wrong.. there's nothing in this world is 100% right..n 100%wrong.. there's always 2 sides in a coin.. and that's what a life is.. 100% TRUE AND RIGHT IS HIM!! no one and nothing else.. positively sure about this.... no one else including yourselves that you can trust not to hurt or dissapoint yourselves... It is only HIM whom you can fully trust..

haloooowwww...
aaaahhhh~
so lazy...
im doing my specialism project... however i found that doing research is damn lazy.. im just hoping that i have more spirit in doing all of these... i feel happy in doing it.. but when it comes to find ideas n reasearch?? oh...... damn lazy and stressing.. seems like my energy gone somewhere and there is just lazyness and tiredness left... at the same time i felt that this is my path and im enjoying it.. i'm quite sure.. yeah... God.. please give me more energy to fight my own laziness.. should i sleep now first? sleepy............